It's Not Too Late: Helping Teens Learn Self-Regulation

The teenage years present unique challenges for self-regulation. There are major physiological changes occurring, a capacity for more complex emotions and relationships, increased pressures, the task of establishing our identity and working toward independence just to name a few.

Given the significant impact of the Self-Regulation Training System (SRTS) with elementary-age children, it was a natural next step to reach out to teenagers. Research indicates that self-regulation skills predict academic success, healthy social relationships, wellness, happiness, the absence of mental health issues, and college success. Those who regulate well are generally more pro-active in their approach to life, while those who regulate poorly are generally more reactive.

Brad Chapin, best-selling author of "Helping Young People Learn Self-Regulation," recently released the highly anticipated strategy guide for helping teens learn these skills that are so critical for success. Consistent with the SRTS, self-regulation skills are broken into three areas:

• Physical - Recognizing physical warning signs to upset and learning to get calm and safe
• Emotional - Accurately identifying feelings; learning to express them in healthy ways; understanding that we are in control of our own feelings and that nothing/nobody can make you feel a certain way
• Cognitive - Learning to identify and challenge unhealthy/extreme thinking; learning to get our needs met in healthy ways; basic problem-solving and planning

Click here for more information about to get your copy of the new strategy guide.
For more information on the Self-Regulation Training System, visit www.selfregulationtraining.com

Self-Regulation Books for Children

We all remember our favorite books from our childhood... the images, the characters and the lessons we learned by watching the characters. Stories can be a powerful way to introduce skills to children.

The Legend of the Regulators and the SECRET List, written by best-selling author Brad Chapin, engages children in the adventures of Tomas as he struggles to complete his quest to save his children.

This unique story takes children on a journey to discover the secrets of a long, healthy, happy life. Help Tomas unlock the Secrets as he travels through the Caves of Calm, the Forest of Feelings and the Labyrinth of Lies to reclaim the pieces of the Secret List of the Regulators.

This book also takes advantage of hidden pictures and symbols to really tap into a child's curiosity and engage them in searching through the amazing artwork of illustrator Kayann Ausherman.

This interactive, adventure story allows children to join Tomas on his quest to unlock the mystery of the Regulators’ Secret List. Travel with Tomas on his quest to help his children succeed and to discover the Secrets of a long, healthy, happy life.

Self-Regulation skills have been shown to increase academic performance, positive social interaction, physical health, emotional wellness and performance in many areas of life.


Get your copy today!!

For more Self-Regulation Training Resources, visit www.selfregulationstation.com

Self-Regulation Skills: From Exposure to Application

Who would believe that showing someone a film of a soccer game and defining the terms would be sufficient in developing the skills necessary to play soccer effectively? We understand that exposing individuals to new things is a very important first step. But we also understand that more must happen if we expect the skills to develop.

 

Evidence indicating that healthy Self-Regulation skills are critical for success and happiness continues to mount. Our ability to manage our own thoughts, feelings and behaviors in response to life's challenges significantly impacts how successful and happy we will be.

 

The first step in Self-Regulation Training is exposure. The Self-Regulation Training System suggests that there is an organized, systematic way for teaching these skills in three skill-training areas:

• Physical Regulation - learning our body's warning signs and how to calm down when we feel these warning signs
• Emotional Regulation - learning to accurately label our emotions, express them in healthy ways, and take ownership of them
• Cognitive Regulation - learning to identify and challenge unhealthy thinking, get needs met in healthy ways, plan and problem solve effectively
  As with learning any new skill, there is a process involved. The first step in learning a new skill is exposure. We are first exposed to the concepts and given the vocabulary. We begin to understand the language. We are fairly good at teaching this level of skill-building.
   
  However, this is unfortunately where we like to stop, or where we can get stuck with teaching a new set of skills. This seems to be especially true when it comes to emotional and behavioral skills. We seem to do a much better job with other types of skills like sports or academics... possibly because these skills are easier to measure and can be more clearly demonstrated.
  If we want individuals to move from exposure to application of new skills, we need to progress through the process of true skill-development. Here are a few important elements to consider when moving from exposure to application:

• Practice & Repetition - Healthy Self-Regulation skills don't always seem to come naturally. It's very important to practice, especially when individuals have had several years of exposure to unhealthy self-regulation. Be creative and come from different angles.
• Reinforcement - Once skills have been taught and consistent expectations have been put into place, use consequences (positive and negative) to reinforce the skills you want to see. Point out natural consequences and draw attention to real-life examples of how Self-Regulation skills lead to success.
• Connect Skills to Purpose & Meaning - Human beings are great at associating concepts. Help individuals make the connections between healthy Self-Regulation skills and success. Skills become much stronger when we realize how much better things go for us when we use them.
  Remember, exposure is a great first step, but when we are wanting to build skills, we need to continue the process. We will never be perfect at Self-Regulation skills. It's an ongoing process, but any improvements we are able to make will have dramatic effects on our performance, our happiness and the happiness of those around us.

Give the Gift of Self-regulation to a Child this Season

Teaching your children to regulate their own emotions is a gift that will stay with them throughout their lives and help them reach their goals. We all run into difficult situations, even during the holidays. These situations are perfect opportunities to model for our children how to handle stress.

Hopefully you will have some extra time to spend with your children this holiday season. Here are a few simple things you can do to improve your child's self-regulation:

• Take a little extra time to spend one-on-one with your children. It's easier to hear what they have to say and to communicate what you would like for them to hear from you when there are just two of you.
• Tell stories of your family traditions and how they came to be. Family traditions provide a child with a strong sense of identity and connectedness that serve as the foundation for healthy self-control.
• Communicate the need to be thankful for what they have, and the importance of helping others. The holiday season provides opportunities to give back to those who may be less fortunate.
• Try and remember to "guide" children to come to a healthy conclusion when they struggle with social/emotional issues. We are often too busy, or have a strong desire to "fix" things quickly. Helping children learn to problem-solve on their own is a skill that will help them to be more successful no matter what challenges they may face.

Taking a few minutes to help your children learn self-regulation is a gift that will continue to produce rewards in all areas of their lives. Those who regulate well are more successful:

• in social relationships
• in school with better grades
• in self-care and physical health
• in sports
• at achieving their goals
• in life in general 

Enjoy your holiday season and give a gift that truly keeps on giving.

Brad Chapin, LCP, LMLP
brad.chapin@cpschallenge.com

Autism Spectrum Disorders and Self-regulation

With statistics from the Center for Disease Control now indicating Autism Spectrum disorders being present in approximately 1 out of every 110 births, questions about treatment strategies continue to rise.

As we know, children with Spectrum disorders often struggle with:

• Social interaction



• Moderating sensory responses



• Appropriate Emotional responses



• Communication

Each of these areas directly relates to Self-regulation. For example, having an average, or moderate, response when someone says "Hello" works much better socially than saying nothing, or shouting. In social situations, being able to appropriately regulate ones response can have a significant impact on making and keeping friends.

When addressing Self-regulation issues, it can be helpful to simplify the behaviors down into two main categories:

1. Over-responding: An extreme outward response to an event that most individuals would see as ordinary (e.g. - Screaming when a door opens)



2. Under-responding: Little or no response to something that most individuals would have an external response to (e.g. - Eye contact, social greetings or pain)
   

When assisting children with special needs, we spend a great deal of time working on eliminating "extreme" responses to neutral stimuli (e.g. - sounds, clothing or transitions).

Many people draw upon Behavioral interventions (eliminating triggers, applying consequences, modeling, etc.) to reduce these extreme responses.

However, it's also important to address the Emotional and Cognitive aspects of Self-regulation to increase the chances of success. This can include:

• Teaching the child how to implement his/her own appropriate calming techniques



• Breaking interactions down as they happen to process responses together



• Utilizing stories, games, and videos to teach appropriate emotional expression
  

Our goal as parents is for our children to be able to regulate themselves effectively. This process happens over time and on a continuum. Be sure to remind yourself that any movement down the continuum toward Self-regulation is a step toward Success:)

*If you work with children who have an interest in computers or technology, it may be beneficial to use an intervention tool like the Challenge Software Program to help engage them in the process.

Brad Chapin, LCP, LMLP

email: brad.chapin@cpschallenge.com