It's Not Too Late: Helping Teens Learn Self-Regulation

The teenage years present unique challenges for self-regulation. There are major physiological changes occurring, a capacity for more complex emotions and relationships, increased pressures, the task of establishing our identity and working toward independence just to name a few.

Given the significant impact of the Self-Regulation Training System (SRTS) with elementary-age children, it was a natural next step to reach out to teenagers. Research indicates that self-regulation skills predict academic success, healthy social relationships, wellness, happiness, the absence of mental health issues, and college success. Those who regulate well are generally more pro-active in their approach to life, while those who regulate poorly are generally more reactive.

Brad Chapin, best-selling author of "Helping Young People Learn Self-Regulation," recently released the highly anticipated strategy guide for helping teens learn these skills that are so critical for success. Consistent with the SRTS, self-regulation skills are broken into three areas:

• Physical - Recognizing physical warning signs to upset and learning to get calm and safe
• Emotional - Accurately identifying feelings; learning to express them in healthy ways; understanding that we are in control of our own feelings and that nothing/nobody can make you feel a certain way
• Cognitive - Learning to identify and challenge unhealthy/extreme thinking; learning to get our needs met in healthy ways; basic problem-solving and planning

Click here for more information about to get your copy of the new strategy guide.
For more information on the Self-Regulation Training System, visit www.selfregulationtraining.com

Self-Regulation Skills: From Exposure to Application

Who would believe that showing someone a film of a soccer game and defining the terms would be sufficient in developing the skills necessary to play soccer effectively? We understand that exposing individuals to new things is a very important first step. But we also understand that more must happen if we expect the skills to develop.

 

Evidence indicating that healthy Self-Regulation skills are critical for success and happiness continues to mount. Our ability to manage our own thoughts, feelings and behaviors in response to life's challenges significantly impacts how successful and happy we will be.

 

The first step in Self-Regulation Training is exposure. The Self-Regulation Training System suggests that there is an organized, systematic way for teaching these skills in three skill-training areas:

• Physical Regulation - learning our body's warning signs and how to calm down when we feel these warning signs
• Emotional Regulation - learning to accurately label our emotions, express them in healthy ways, and take ownership of them
• Cognitive Regulation - learning to identify and challenge unhealthy thinking, get needs met in healthy ways, plan and problem solve effectively
  As with learning any new skill, there is a process involved. The first step in learning a new skill is exposure. We are first exposed to the concepts and given the vocabulary. We begin to understand the language. We are fairly good at teaching this level of skill-building.
   
  However, this is unfortunately where we like to stop, or where we can get stuck with teaching a new set of skills. This seems to be especially true when it comes to emotional and behavioral skills. We seem to do a much better job with other types of skills like sports or academics... possibly because these skills are easier to measure and can be more clearly demonstrated.
  If we want individuals to move from exposure to application of new skills, we need to progress through the process of true skill-development. Here are a few important elements to consider when moving from exposure to application:

• Practice & Repetition - Healthy Self-Regulation skills don't always seem to come naturally. It's very important to practice, especially when individuals have had several years of exposure to unhealthy self-regulation. Be creative and come from different angles.
• Reinforcement - Once skills have been taught and consistent expectations have been put into place, use consequences (positive and negative) to reinforce the skills you want to see. Point out natural consequences and draw attention to real-life examples of how Self-Regulation skills lead to success.
• Connect Skills to Purpose & Meaning - Human beings are great at associating concepts. Help individuals make the connections between healthy Self-Regulation skills and success. Skills become much stronger when we realize how much better things go for us when we use them.
  Remember, exposure is a great first step, but when we are wanting to build skills, we need to continue the process. We will never be perfect at Self-Regulation skills. It's an ongoing process, but any improvements we are able to make will have dramatic effects on our performance, our happiness and the happiness of those around us.

New App for Teaching Self-Regulation Skills!

Get the App

We are very excited to announce this brand new tool for engaging children in the process of learning and practicing self-regulatory skills. As you may already know, self-regulation is directly related to success in many areas including academic performance, positive behaviors, the development of social skills, and emotional control.

This interactive New App for Self-Regulation, is another big step forward in providing children, professionals, and parents avenues to practice these skills and apply in them in real-life situations. The App follows the Self-Regulation Training System, created by best-selling author and international speaker Brad Chapin, by addressing the areas of Physical, Emotional and Cognitive regulation skills.

The Self-regulation Training System (SRTS) continues to gain interest from educators, school counselors, mental health professionals, and parents as the "common core" for behavior. Lessons and curriculum from this system continue to produce significant, measurable improvements in the self-regulation skills of children and teenagers.

Many have long struggled with the gap between theory and practice. The SRTS provides concrete lessons, activities and tools focused on developing and maintaining skills for success.

Based on the success of the Challenge Software Program, a web-based tool that uses games and short video scenarios to help children challenge unhealthy thinking, we've continued to believe in utilizing technology to engage today's youth.

We would like to thank our partners at Wichita State University for their excellent work on this exciting tool for helping children succeed!

Visit www.selfregulationtraining.com for more information on the Self-Regulation Training System, to schedule a training with Brad, or to view other engaging tools for teaching self-regulation.

Self-Regulation Skills and School Readiness

Research continues to show that self-regulation skills are critical for success in many areas. Self-regulation is the set of skills we use to help control and direct our thoughts, feelings and behaviors. The job of a thermostat is a great analogy for self-regulation. It constantly monitors the temperature in the room, and when something changes, it initiates an action that will bring the temperature back into balance.

Children with well-developed self-regulation skills:

• Have fewer behavior problems (Blair & Diamond, 2008)
• Have higher reading and math achievement in Kindergarten (Blair & Razza, 2007)
• Are able to manage their feelings and behaviors better (Blair & Diamond, 2008)
• Are more socially-emotionally competent

In contrast, poor self-regulation has been linked to:

• High rates of expulsion in preschool classrooms (Gilliam & Shahar, 2006)
• Lower reading and math achievement in Kindergarten (Blair & Razza, 2007)
• Aggressive and oppositional behavior (Graziano et al., 2006; Raver, 2004)

What Can We Do?
As with most skills, early exposure and training is best. The Self-Regulation Training System offers a simple, concrete method for teaching children the skills necessary for improving self-regulation.

We begin with simple lessons to help young children learn how to regulate their physical responses to changes changes in the environment. We teach them how to recognize their Warning Signs and then how to regulate them.

We then move to helping them learn how to regulate their emotions by labeling, expressing and owning their feelings. With preschool-age children, we do not get very far into cognitive regulation skills. However, we do find tools like the Self-Regulation Training Board to be very helpful.

Results of the Self-Regulation Training System have been shown to significantly increase self-regulation skills. Recently, 380 First Grade children received 6 hours of Self-Regulation training over a 6-week period of time. The average score on the Self-Regulation Teacher Rating Scale improved from 72 to 87. This extremely significant outcome is very exciting and underscores the notion that young children are capable of learning self-regulation skills to increase success and school readiness.

by Brad Chapin, LCP, LMLP
brad.chapin@cpschallenge.com
www.selfregulationtraining.com

Engaging Children in Cognitive Therapy with the Right Tools

Some critics say that we shouldn't use Cognitive Therapy
techniques with children because it's "too advanced" and
they "won't understand."

I often wonder if those critics had children of their own, because
if they did, they would realize that children are forming "beliefs"
about their world from the time they are able to experience their
environment.

I do agree that we should not use the same types of strategies,
or advanced vocabulary, with children as we do with adults. However,
there are engaging tools that can help children learn to identify and challenge
unhealthy thoughts to improve their mood and behavior.

The Challenge Software Program utilizes short video clips that begin
with an "Activating Event." We then freeze the action to present
Healthy and Unhealthy thoughts that the main character might have about
the event. Next, we have the competing thoughts challenge each
other to resolve the cognitive dissonance. This takes place in
a short video game format where the child tries to "defeat" the
unhealthy thoughts. The ending to the video clip and the fate
of our main character depend on which thought wins.

Engaging cognitive therapy tools, like the Challenge Software Program,
can help children begin to understand that they have control over their
own moods and behaviors. They will begin to identify unhealthy
thought patterns and learn how to effective challenge those beliefs.

by Brad Chapin, LCP, LMLP
Creator of the Challenge Software Program &
Author of "Helping Young People Learn Self-regulation"

Give the Gift of Self-regulation to a Child this Season

Teaching your children to regulate their own emotions is a gift that will stay with them throughout their lives and help them reach their goals. We all run into difficult situations, even during the holidays. These situations are perfect opportunities to model for our children how to handle stress.

Hopefully you will have some extra time to spend with your children this holiday season. Here are a few simple things you can do to improve your child's self-regulation:

• Take a little extra time to spend one-on-one with your children. It's easier to hear what they have to say and to communicate what you would like for them to hear from you when there are just two of you.
• Tell stories of your family traditions and how they came to be. Family traditions provide a child with a strong sense of identity and connectedness that serve as the foundation for healthy self-control.
• Communicate the need to be thankful for what they have, and the importance of helping others. The holiday season provides opportunities to give back to those who may be less fortunate.
• Try and remember to "guide" children to come to a healthy conclusion when they struggle with social/emotional issues. We are often too busy, or have a strong desire to "fix" things quickly. Helping children learn to problem-solve on their own is a skill that will help them to be more successful no matter what challenges they may face.

Taking a few minutes to help your children learn self-regulation is a gift that will continue to produce rewards in all areas of their lives. Those who regulate well are more successful:

• in social relationships
• in school with better grades
• in self-care and physical health
• in sports
• at achieving their goals
• in life in general 

Enjoy your holiday season and give a gift that truly keeps on giving.

Brad Chapin, LCP, LMLP
brad.chapin@cpschallenge.com

Computer-assisted Counseling Resources for Children

Children are spending the majority of their waking hours interacting with technology. Why aren't we aggressively tapping into this time and using their interest to teach them useful skills?

To engage today's youth, we adults must be aware of the youth culture. What do you think a child would do if you gave them the option to learn something in a workbook, or learn it while interacting with a computer?

Resources that involve videos and interactive games engage children on "their turf." They feel less threatened because the technology is familiar to them. Their defenses are often lower when watching, or interacting, with characters in a computer program because it's less direct. They are able to relate to the situations and characters, but it's much less intimidating than a direct line of questioning.   

We have been noting the benefits of computer-assisted counseling techniques for several years while developing the Challenge Software Program for children (a program that uses video scenarios and games to teach children the basics of self-regulation). From our experience, there is really no comparison between the engagement of children when it comes to computer-assisted counseling techniques and traditional interventions. If you don't believe it, ask a child. Or better yet, try it for yourself:)


Brad Chapin, LCP, LMLP
brad.chapin@cpschallenge.com  

Using REBT to Promote Self-reguation in Children

The Challenge Software Program for children was designed to help children establish healthy thinking patterns and learn to identify and effectively challenge thoughts that are unhealthy.

Over the past few years this program has helped hundreds of children do just that. We continue to hear examples where the program is being used to help children struggling to learn how to regulate their mood and behavior. These examples come from children who have experienced trauma, depression, anxiety, and numerous other issues.

Here is an example submitted by one of the children using the Challenge Software Program. Think about how powerful this change in thinking will be for this child.

"I remember a family friend giving me and my friend a bath when we were young.

He put us in the tub and touched me in ways he shouldn't have.

The child reports thinking, "Oh...this is terrible. I am bad and feel worthless."

After using the Challenge Software Program and understanding that she can control her own

thoughts and feelings about herself, she writes a new belief:

"It was not my fault. I was a small child. I can be okay even though a bad

thing happened to me."

I recently presented at an Innovative Counseling conference in San Antonio (click here for slides from the presentation on slideshare). It was great to see the innovation and creativity that is still alive in developing new tools to reach the children of today. It was also great to see that these creative strategies are based soundly on solid approaches like Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy (REBT).

We must continue to innovate and create new ways of reaching today's youth. If we do not help them create and maintain healthy beliefs, they will struggle to regulate their mood and behavior their entire lives.

Brad Chapin LCP, LMLP

brad.chapin@cpschallenge.com

3 Reasons Why Every Parent Should Know about Self-regulation Training

As parents, we receive lots of advice about the "Do's and Don'ts"of parenting. It's sometimes difficult to know what to do with our children.

Maybe we should just start by asking what we would wish for our children. Check out this list of wishes:

1. I want my children to live a long life
   



2. I want them to be healthy and happy
   



3. I want them to be successful

I think many parents would include these items in their top 5 wishes for their children. Please feel free to comment if you have other wishes for your children that you would like to share.

The question is, "As parents, what can we do to help make this list of wishes become a reality?" This question is quickly followed by, "How much time and energy do I have as a parent to learn everything about parenting, and how will I be able to apply all of that information to help these wishes come true?"

As a parent of 3 myself, I strongly believe in usefulness and practicality. If it's not realistic or practical to implement, it's just not happening. Thankfully, there is a relatively simple and straightforward set of skills that we can help our children develop. A healthy dose of Self-regulation is related to:

• Longevity - self-regulation is highly correlated with living longer
  



• Academic Success - self-regulation predicts academic success better than IQ
  



• Health and Wealth - those that learn to regulate themselves fair much better

If we focus our efforts on teaching our children how to regulate their own thoughts, behaviors and emotions, we will give our children the best chance of reaching their potential, and realizing the wishes we have for them. The great thing about this concept is that Self-regulation can be taught:)

Brad Chapin, LCP, LMLP brad.chapin@cpschallenge.com

http://www.cpchallenge.com/